September 8, 2011

Longings

I spoke today, via instant messenger, to the man that was my first (and only) Master. It's been 2 years since our relationship ended. Much to my surprise, all those old feelings came rushing back. I loved him with my whole heart. It wasn't supposed to happen, I didn't want it to happen. But no matter how wrong it all was, we were just right for each other.

I long for that relationship. I long to worship Him freely. I long to show him how much I love Him. I long to please Him in any way that He wishes. He was the only man I ever obeyed without question or complaint, no matter the request.

I ache inside for what I can't have. That makes it all the worse, because I love my husband, and couldn't imagine a life without him. I will not reply to any more emails He sends. It's for the best, all around. He is off limits.

2 comments:

Sweet girl said...

I feel for you! I can only imagine how you must feel, I can't imagine losing my Master...I'd be so lost. And if i then got to speak to him again then it would all come rushing back again (actually writing it i realize it's a lot like an ex-vanilla relationship of mine). A Master is something so special, it goes so deep.

I'm so sorry it's difficult for you. You're right maybe it's for the best, but i understand how difficult that is for you, it's like being stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Sending you virtual hugs,
Sweet girl.

littleOne said...

arrghh you poor thing. Difficult to want it all..and we kinky sluts do want it all. :)

All the best in what ever you do. I'm sure your Master wouldn't want to jeopardise your marriage. I get the impression no self-respecting Dom would.
L x